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ego What you how you doing?

We've said it many times but I repeat: all the decisions we make are based on one of these feelings: love or ego , the latter being the product of fear, either one of these five reasons: fear of failure, rejection, loss of power, change or survival.

Today I want to hold on the ego. In the coming days will speak about the book emotional compass for sailors, a great book of Punset Elsa. In it the author devotes a section with the title: What we have learned from others affects us: the collective ego (pp. 202-205). There are collected the words of Carol Anthony Love, an Inner Conection : "When we adopted a successful ego and identify with it, adoption society returns with awards and prizes to our private line, we are loyal members of a church or state, and we became the guardians of acceptable models. As we fit into the established order we become part of the collective ego. "

Then Elsa says:" When we were children almost all told us repeatedly, as an unassailable truth, that our feelings were not valid to judge what was appropriate behavior in each case. When we reached adulthood and do not trust our intuition and emotions. The adult needs to learn to reclaim their ability to judge for yourself and trust your emotions. To this must fight the mental and emotional parameters imposed by education and sanctioned by society, so similar that seem themselves.

He continues: "The writer Carol Anthony describes the ego as a set of images ourselves that we have chosen to be less vulnerable in the face of others. While our ego can often get confused and we identify with these images as if they were our true self, the ego no longer be a paper, a charade that we act every day with almost total conviction. The ego is so convincing because it holds all rational social structure. The ego seems a safe haven because there we less vulnerable to others. But the adult who is confused with his ego is as if he had been dressed in clothes that do not belong and yet identifies with what he wears. Although the emotional self of each person can be punished, no fool ever get completely. As soon as a failure or shock, the conflict between the ego and the truth of each individual comes out of consciousness. Are shaken the foundations of the ego then painstakingly crafted for each person and question the external truths learned.

Anthony

Ensures that the collective ego is instinctively aware of all those who do not fit into the system. Free elements inspire fear (...). When we grow most of us realize this state of things and we fit in accordingly. We decided to play the game of the social ego and adapt to what we are offered, or seek a group of people with whom we can identify together to feel more safer. It is very difficult to give the sense of belonging to a group of people, especially since we've been trained to be afraid of being isolated and therefore we cling to the need to feel accepted. "

In short, just connecting with oneself, something that virtually no one does, some monks and other people dedicated to meditation, is not easily released ego out of fear, causing not a few frustrations. Only with great self-knowledge, analysis and reflection can get ahead without getting caught by the nets of collective ego.

* Today do not miss the excellent post on The slapping of the comments and their influence on self-esteem , Marta Colomina (@ martacolomina), and I leave the phrase of the month via @ blpgirl that talks about children.